Facebook Wars Of Beacon Hills
by ImNotDeadYet13
Summary: Facebook, can't live with it, can't live without it. Even if you live in the town that is the largest supernatural beacon.
1. I Hate You All

Well I'm at it again...  
So yeah, I did a Supernatural one so why not Teen Wolf?  
Well anyway here it goes hate it or love it I don't care  
also everyone lives well most everyone you'll figure it out

* * *

Uncle Creeper  
_1 hour ago_  
_**Who fucking changed my name and how the fuck do I change it back?!**_  
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Derek Hale, Scott McCall and 16 others like this

Derek Hale: Shouldn't leave yourself logged in on my computer…  
Uncle Creeper: Well nephew I know for a fact you aren't smart enough to even think of doing this so it must be the skinny one!  
Stiles Stilinski: "The Skinny One" is proud of you for taking a while 4 hours to figure it out  
Uncle Creeper: I just noticed it an hour ago! Fix it!  
Stiles Stilinski: Why would I do that? Maybe this is pay back for all those gross messages I saw from Mr. Argent  
Uncle Creeper: Well maybe you shouldn't have been creeping around on my facebook to begin with!  
Stiles Stilinski: You should feel loved I just wanted to know what it felt like to be like you, creeping around all the time XD  
Uncle Creeper: Why am I even friends with you people -.-  
Derek Hale: Really? You sat around and gave us all puppy dog eyes until we agreed to accept your request  
Peter Hale: I hate you all

* * *

Peter Hale  
_20 minutes ago_  
_**My hit list grows larger everyday**_  
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Cora Hale: Not really the thing to announce on facebook…  
Chris Argent: Ignore it, he's just still upset over Stiles messing around on his page  
Peter Hale: The little bastard unliked all the pages I spent HOURS finding!  
Cora Hale: And just when I was starting to think you were somewhat sane again.. Please just don't kill anyone, mainly Stiles I'd hate to have to come back for your funeral since if you killed Stiles Derek would well you know what Derek would do  
Chris Argent: Don't worry I'll make sure he behaves, if not I'm pretty sure I have a leash around here somewhere  
Peter Hale: I hate you all

* * *

Like it? Hate it?  
Review it


	2. Just Bring Food

for once in my life i've written more chapters a head of time...  
posting depends on what y'all have to say

* * *

Cora Hale wrote on Derek Hale's wall  
_30 minutes ago_**  
**_**Wait so is Allison our cousin now?**_  
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Allison Argent: Hi Cora, I guess since you've been away Derek has failed to fill you in, we as a pack have decided to ignore whatever it is my father and your uncle are doing no matter how hard they try and rub it in our faces :)  
Derek Hale: Pretty much what she said….  
Cora Hale: yall are seriously no fun  
Peter Hale: and this is why cora is my favorite  
Cora Hale: awh I love you too uncle creeper xoxo  
Peter Hale: I take that back -.-

* * *

Peter Hale  
_1 hour ago_  
_**Going to ignore all the negative people trying to ruin my good mood and enjoy this nice day cleaning the whole house**_  
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Cora Hale, Scott McCall and 2 others like this

Scott McCall: Maybe you should clean up the loft a little bit… I guess Derek didn't get the neat side of the Hale genes  
Peter Hale: He has Stiles for that, what other reasons are there to keep the runt around  
Scott McCall: …  
Peter Hale: nvm don't answer that  
Chris Argent: Peter must you always act so childish? Stop whining on Facebook and answer your phone  
Peter Hale: Scotty did you say something? Hmm thought I heard something  
Chris Argent: Really Peter? Really? I'll be visiting the Sheriff while you learn to act your age

* * *

**Chat**

**From: Stiles Stilinski - To: Derek Hale**  
**SS**: _Can I come over?_  
**DH**: _um sure? Why didn't you just text or call me?_  
**SS**: _Left my phone in the living room rather not go back for it,_  
_there's a seriously pissed off Argent talking with my dad_  
_all I heard was something about Peter, sping cleaning, shitty pop music,_  
_and withholding sex… Please save my poor ears D:_  
**DH**: _whatever, just bring food_  
**SS**: _you got it sourwolf :D on my way with pizza eta:30 minutes_

* * *

Yes this is a crack fic so yes everyone is meant to be OOC


	3. STILES STOP WITH THE DOG JOKES!

this is also being posted on AO3 just fyi  
Same name and all that

* * *

Stiles Stilinski  
_20 minutes ago_  
_**Bacon Vodka is a no go! Ugh where's the toilet…**_  
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Scott McCall: again dude I'm sorry! It smelled good so I thought it'd taste good…  
Stiles Stilinski: Scott you are a WEREWOLF it smells like meat of course you're gonna think it'd taste good! Next time just buy yourself some bacon strips  
Scott McCall: I don't see how being a werewolf has anything to do with it -.-  
Stiles Stilinski: werewolf=dog! bacon strips are dog treats! god I shouldn't have to explain my own dog jokes anymore  
Isaac Lahey: well if you're tired of explaining them it might just be best for everyone if you stop making them no one finds them funny anyway  
Stiles Stilinski: Isaac shut up! One of you come clean the puke off my floor I'm going back to bed!

* * *

Allison Argent  
_1 hour ago_  
_**Wow, just read a study that proved that people with dogs tend to live longer**_  
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Lydia Martin, Scott McCall and 8 others like this

Chris Argent: for the last time we are not getting a dog!  
Stiles Stilinski: really Allison you already have 3  
Chris Argent: I can normally decipher your stupid jokes but for the first time I'm stumped I get Isaac and Scott are dogs real funny haven't heard that 100 times but who's the third?  
Stiles Stilinski: Peter :)  
Chris Argent: … yeah I'm done  
Isaac Lahey: STILES STOP WITH THE DOG JOKES!

* * *

there's a life lesson in here  
never try bacon vodka unless you feel like hugging your toilet  
and never make dog jokes at werewolves  
I mean come on guys its rather offensive


	4. STORY TO BE DELETED PLEASE READ

Hey guys, sorry not an update just a heads up

I WILL NO LONGER BE POSTING THIS STORY ON HERE!

Apparently it breaks some really stupid rule but again it is a rule so I'm gonna follow it  
This story is also being posted on ao3 same name think my name is the same on here too just without the 13 I will try and get a chapter posted tonight or tomorrow to make up for this

Sorry again guys

Might delete my whole FF account so please guys follow/read/comment/whatever this story over on ao3

-ImNotDeadYet


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